The last few months I have been on edge about work. It is not my dream job by any means, but I am thankful everyday that I have a job. Do I make a lot of money, no I don't. But I make enough to barely make ends meet. It def can be a struggle when some paychecks come along. It is not that I really don't like my job...it just doesn't interest me. It is hard to do something everyday that just doesn't interest you. I have learned a ton, but it's not fun. In my opinion it is important to have fun while working and to enjoy it at the same time. I could normally have fun at work despite not liking what I do until lately. It has been such a chore to be there. I know I have not given my best in these months and I don't like that at all. I give my all in everything I am involved with: family, friends, coaching, working out, my faith....everything! I wouldn't say I have been lazy but more careless. If I made a mistake I didn't care and that has never been my attitude.
I have always believed in angels especially guardian angels. Those angels are very special. I was told when I was younger that if you sit in a very quiet room and listen carefully they say their name. If that's true I have no idea, but kinda cool if it was! I can't really recall a certain situation that my guardian angel has made its presence...until today. I was at my absolute breaking point today. I had been holding in a lot of emotions and feelings in regards to my work place. Loads of frustration! I was brought into my review this afternoon. I was shaking and emotional before it really even started. I was asked if I liked what I did. My response, no I don't at all. Other questions asked etc...I don't know if I have ever been more brutally honest during a review. I literally spoke my mind just like I do when I'm by myself thinking. It was almost like a dream. I pointed out weaknesses in my supervisors....expressed my frustrations. I did not use any cuss words...very clean. I explained that I always give my all and lately I just haven't and I don't like it. At this point my crying and super upset. One because it was all just coming out and two because I just spoke like that to another person...a person who could fire me if they really wanted. One of them was speaking...about what I don't recall....but I slapped my hand on the table cause I was just tired of hearing it....I said "you know what?" and I stood up took two steps to walk out....and I was stopped dead in my tracks. I don't even know how I got back to my chair. I know without a doubt it was my guardian angel saying you need this job regardless if it something you like or not. I am so thankful for my angel. As a human we just don't think things all the way thru.....if I would have walked out...I would have been without a job and who knows when the next would come along. We talked things out and ended on a good note...thankful that as well.
Those of you who are in my position with your job..not happy. Please stick with it despite all the frustration. Things have to get better and they will. Its not like its the worst thing ever its just not comfortable. Be in tuned with your guardian angel. I know that do so many things to protect us because its just not time yet. Don't let evil or negativity win. That's what I learned today. I know that you are exactly where you are for a reason...you don't know the reason and that's okay. God is good and you are too!
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